but you are my strength 'nd my life.
you're the only one that gives me strength.
i would never want you to fall apart.
if you do, i do too. please be strong for me."
that's when i knew i had to remain strong.'nd keep my head up - regardless of the matter.
who else is gonna do it? no one, but me.
it was another heart to heart conversation with my mom.
today's the day he's suppose to arrive back to us, safely.
unfortunately, like every other time. he didn't show, or call.
that's when i knew my mom couldn't take it anymore.
i rushed straight to my room, 'nd cried to myself.
did mom 'nd i do something wrong that made him not want us anymore?
did he forget about us already? did he not want us in his life? - i'm lost.
simply spinnin' in never endin' thoughts wonderin' how he could do this.
everytime he said "i love you 'nd i miss you darling. can't wait to see you."
WAS IT A COMPLETE LIE, again?
Now mom's leavin' to confront you this thursday.
This is goin' to be most independent I've ever been.
Dad, I'll prove to you that I can handle with out you.
But why are you doing this is mom. I'm being strong for her.
You're just making everything worst.
I hate you at this very moment.
but deep inside I love you, for making me stronger.
I'm not the same little girl crying to her parents after watching a scary movie.
I know it's not real, and you taught me that. You made me braver.
I'm not the same little girl running around the playground laughing endlessly.
I'm workin', supportin', and takin' care of my own self. I'm independent.
I'm not that same little girl you left behind in August 2K8.
I'm 15 years old now, I made it to play offs last year, I got a 3.8 gpa (wish it was a 4.0)
I've accomplished so much things without you here.
So you can walk out my life. Just warn me before you do.
Tell me you don't want me, so I can move on. I know you love us, somehow.
Despite the bullshit -
You're still my dad.